Wednesday, February 10, 2010

I'm trying to get up the courage

So kit, here we are six months later. I've been busy keeping my head in the sand for the past six months and certainly doing everything that I can to avoid heartache. Not much has changed, huh?

I know that you're getting tired and so I'm going to do the right thing. What is the right thing? The right thing is for you not to deteriorate to the point where you are constantly in pain and for me to be assured that I have explored all possibilities and made the decision to say good bye with no would haves, should haves or could haves. You and I have exhausted all of our options. Medicine isn't helping and even though you're constantly by my side purring, head butting and sitting on the computer keyboard, it seems like the bad days now out number the good.

I guess it's time for me to step up to the plate and release you to take your journey to the place where you'll feel no more pain. You can't know how much I hate this. It would be so much better if you could have just peacefully passed on one night wrapped in your blanket on the bed. That has been my wish, but alas it hasn't taken place.

Dianne will call me tomorrow to tell me when she and Debbie will be here to help me release you. You and I are very lucky to have Dianne and Debbie in our lives. It's better for you and better for me if we bid each other adieu here at home with you wrapped in your new blanket in my arms.

Kitty, kit, kit you're such a big part of my heart that I'm not sure how long it will take for my heart to return to normal again.

Love,
Sharon

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